I recently worked with a young girl for nine lessons over 5 days.
She is 3 years old and on the Autistic spectrum, a delightful child who for a year had been taught that her stimming was something that needed to be stopped. Tantrums were a major part of her life, and her mother was exhausted and in battle mode with her much of the time.
Her mother drove her in from out of town, and they came twice a day to my lesson room.
Here were the results when the mother and the little girl went back home:
1. In her eating, she is far better at using a spoon.
2. With her shoes, she is excited by and refuses help in her efforts to figure out on her own how to do the strap to the shoes.
3.When someone knocks at the door, she says, “Come in. “ ( She had little verbalization at the start of the lessons, outside of singing, which she quite loved. She was good at the ubiquitous, for all parents, all parents, “No.”)
4. She starting saying, “Yes.”
5. She babbles more, in sentences.
6. In her bed, before if the cover wasn’t up, it would stay down. Now she pulls up her own cover.
7. She has much more her interest in others.
8. She smiles as her mother more and seems to be wanting to make sure that her mother knows she is connecting to her.
9. She is more playful.
The mother remarked on how she had learned from the lessons that almost anywhere and anytime could be a place of fun, learning and connection with her and her daughter, that there was not a separation of learning and the rest of life.
She caught on that learning is more like a game than demanding something happen, and hence everywhere they go Awareness. Attention to Differences, Connection, Play, Variation, and more, can be part of their lives. The battles have turned into the delight of two people expanding their play and connection.
The mother learned to gently manipulate her daughter’s rib cage, and can tell that this eases and pleases her daughter, as well as helps her get more connected to herself.
The mother sees her daughter’s simming as something to join, and then modify slightly. It is no longer a battle zone, nor is it a place where the daughter checks out and hides away from reality and her mother.
How did this come about?
Tomorrow’s blog will go through how combining the Anat Baniel method and the philosophy behind Son Rise, these changes were set in motion.
I actually do something quite different than Son Rise, but it as if MORE of where they are headed, rather than less, the way the behavior modifying systems seem to be.